Not that the past is always a bad thing. "Dark blur" can simply be interpreted as baggage. Something one wishes to shed in order to step lightly into the things to come. Many lovely things happened last year; many frustrating and sad things also happened. The first few weeks of a new year blend my hopes and fears, my wishes and dreams, my reality and my feelings of inadequacy into a gloppy, green mash.
The past few days have been whirlwind. Brain fog coupled with that Great Cloud of Unknowing that whispers each January blinded me vision and kept me from writing. I sought solace in books and found myself returning once more into the comforting arms of the words of Madeleine L'Engle.
In "A Circle of Quiet", L'Engle continually returns to the concept of ontology : the word about the essence of things; the word about being.